This is for me

I wrote this for me

Even if I’m mentioning my ‘friend’ who saw the lines on my arms

The blood on my sleeves, and the depression hanging onto me with bright white knuckles

And told people I was faking it as soon as I left the room

This is for me even if I mention my parents who finally caught the signs

And told me it was okay to need help because I was so deep in my own mind I couldn’t see the red dye on my finger tips from the flags I’d been waving

“Mayday!” I was yelling with my lips stitched shut

This is for me even if I mention the only person who listened was also the one who I fell fast and hard for

Then moved away and never saw again

I really need to stop doing that.

This is for me even if I mention that it was my dad and a tiny argument that finally took me to the breaking point

I think I forgave him like 30 minutes after because it was just my phone he took away

Just, also my only coping mechanism.

This is for me, because really; who needs their own truth when they have their own trauma to carry around in a tote bag because it’s way too big to stuff in a backpack

I think I need like 7 totes

This is for me because my truth was a long time coming and when I finally got it out I was too shattered to put myself back together without glue

And extra hands

And extra hearts.

This is for everyone who cannot speak their own truth and told to keep it bottled up because there are too many unhappy people in this world to really stand out as original to yourself

I’m doing this for you.

This is for the people who refuse to speak out because they are scared.

Or too badly scarred for people to see them before they see the raised lines and hot tears burned into their skin

This is for everyone who resonates because resonating with me makes me your friend now.

Sorry you can’t get rid of me